Zexion Goes to the Banana King
by Sukiki-chan
Summary: Ok, the title says it all. This is just some random stuff I came up with. Rated for language and randomness, yes this is a crack fic.


**Hi people!!! Ok, after reading Zexion goes to Candy Mountain by ZexysGirl, I was inspired to write Zexion goes to the Banana King!!! Yes this is my first story, and yes my older sister Demoness Drakon helped me a lot on this...but all of the random crack that is in here is my writing! I don't own Kingdom Hearts, Bleach or Charlie the Unicorn, but I own myself.**

**Zexion goes to the banana king**

Axel, Roxas, and Demyx are watching TV. Suddenly, a gun arrow destroys TV screen. Xigbar comes in.

Xigbar: Aw crap, my gun misfired.

Axel: (Is pissed off) Damn it Xiggy, you killed the TV! And it was the only one too!

Roxas: Uh, Axel, Zexion has a TV in his room and it has cable.

Demyx: Wait, Zexion doesn't let anyone in his room, and he probably doesn't want to share.

Axel: So, we just need to get Zexy out of his room.

Demyx: How are we going to do that?

(Authoress, aka Sukiki, poofs in.)

Sukiki: Hey, I know how!! (All of them look at her like she's insane)

Roxas: Ok…who are you?

Sukiki: (Smiles like an idiot) I'm Sukiki!! And I'm here to solve your problem. And (looks at Axel) to do this (Glomp-tackles Axel)

Axel: (Startled) What the hell? (Sukiki gets off, and smiles)

Sukiki: Now that's out of my system. Here's my plan.

Scene shifts to Zexion's room.

Zexion: (Is sitting on bed, flipping through TV Channels) _Today is going smoothly for once. Iron chef, no, Hannah Montana, Hell no!! Naruto meh, Death note I'm in._

Axel and Roxas barge in wearing scuba gear and acting like they were underwater.

Roxas: Glub glub, oh look a coral reef, ain't it pretty?

Axel: Yes. Oh no a school of poisonous fugu fish

Zexion: What are you two doing?

Axel: We're scuba diving Zexion.

Roxas: We're exploring the depths of the ocean.

Zexion: Go away I'm watching TV.

A vortex opens randomly from the floor. A man with red hair popped out from the wormhole while Axel and Roxas were being sucked in.

Axel: The vortex is open.

Roxas: There's no stopping the vortex now.

Zexion: Ok stop, you're freaking me out more then usual!

Both of the members were consumed by the vortex.

Zexion: (sighs in relief. His eyes fell on the red-haired man sitting on his floor. He was wearing a black men's kimono, armed with a sword and had tattoos on his forehead. Holy crap its Renji!) Who are you?

Renji: Where am I? What have you done with Ichigo and Rukia?!

The vortex reopened and the two members that were sucked in came back out.

Axel: We did it!

Roxas: We got the amulet Sparkle Smarkle.

Zexion: Great, now GO AWAY! I'm tired of the horrible things that happen when you two are around.

Axel & Roxas: Now we have to go see the banana king.

Zexion: Absolutely not!

Roxas: But he's counting on us Zexy.

Axel: If we don't give the amulet to him, the vortex will open and let out 1000 years of darkness.

Roxas: Nooo, darkness.

The vortex opened (again) and a guy with spiky orange hair climbed out of the vortex. Ichigo: Come on Renji, let's get out of here.

Renji: Yeah, this place is creeping me out.

Both of them jumped into the wormhole and disappeared just as the vortex closed.

Zexion: Fine, I'll go. Anything to stop all these crazy people from coming into my room.

Axel & Roxas: YAY!!!

The unlikely trio began walking through Castle Oblivion. Axel and Roxas began to make weird sounds.

Zexion: Will you two shut the hell up?!

They came across a giant letter X.

Zexion: Why is there a giant X in Castle Oblivion?

Axel: Gutentag, wie ghets es Ihnen.

The X flashed different colors.

Roxas: Sie ist scheise.

The X glowed red and shot a lazar at them.

Zexion: Ok what did you two do?!

Roxas: Ich berure.

The X flashed again.

Axel and Roxas were laughing hysterically and creeping out Zexion.

Zexion: (Walks by the two crazies) Just keep walking Zexion.

They kept walking until they reached a large shoe in the middle of a hallway.

Axel: Let's get on the train.

Zexion: What train, all I see is a giant sneaker, and it isn't Saix's.

Roxas: It's the Choo Choo shoe Zexion. Hurry before it leaves.

Zexion: I'm not getting into anyone's diseased shoe!!

Axel & Roxas: Chugga chugga chugga shoe shoe!

Zexion: Oh god, I'm walking. (Just walks behind them)

Axel & Roxas got off the train and began skipping merrily down random hallways. Soon they came across a temple that had an 'x' made by a banana and a hammer

Sukiki: (Poofed in) The banana king's a commie!!! (Poofed away).

Xigbar and Demyx rose out of the ground dressed as pink Christina Aguilera monsters.

Zexion: What are they? (Awkward silence) Anyone say something I'm getting freaked out here.

Both of the organization members that just showed started singing 'Put a banana in your ear'. Axel & Roxas were dancing randomly. The song ended and Xigbar and Demyx burst into flames and disappeared.

Zexion: Of course they burst into flames…I hope that killed them.

Roxas: Go forth amulet, return to the Banana king.

The amulet flew up in the air and shone a sparkily light on Zexion.

Roxas: Zexion, you're the Banana king.

Zexion: WHAT!?!

Zexion began to levitate into the air, towards the amulet. Bananas started climbing all over.

Bananas: You're the banana king.

Zexion: (Is creeped out) I'm not the Banana king!

Axel & Roxas: You are the Banana king Zexion.

Both members portaled away and left Zexion suspended 50ft off the ground.

Zexion: Someone get me down from here!!! (The light disappeared and Zexion dropped butt first on to the ground.) Ow!! (Is really pissed).

In another part of the castle, Axel and Roxas were looking at the spoils of their plan, along with Xigbar, Demyx and (Though they aren't sure why) Sukiki.

Axel: So, let's see what Zexion watches on TV. (Turns on TV, Death note comes on)

Sukiki: Death note? Doesn't surprise me that he watches that.

Roxas: Yeah.

Xigbar: He is a total goth kid.

Demyx: Let's see if Spongebob is on.

Zexion kicks down the room's only door and has his Lexicon. He heard the last few sentences.

Zexion: YOU MORONS JACKED MY TV AND BAD MOUTHED DEATH NOTE!!

Everyone else: OH SHIT!!!! (Portal away)

Zexion: GET BACK HERE! (Chases them through the portal.)

THE END!!!

**Things readers could be wondering:**

**Why did Ichigo and Renji made an appearance? The 1000 years of darkness=soul reapers killing everyone.**

**Why Demyx and Xigbar were dressed as pink Christina Aguilera monsters? I thought it would be funny.**

**What language was that? My sister's very bad German. She's still learning, so there may be mistakes…it's annoying when she speaks in German though.**

**GO Death note.!**

**Anyway, review please, flames get sent to my sister for her to destroy.**


End file.
